You're deluded. Sorry, not sorry.
We live in a world filled with illusions. Don't believe me? Give this a read...
Am I the only person who sometimes starts to question everything? And I mean, eve-ry-thing.
Who am I? Who made me? What is the point in all of this? What is life? Is any of this real? Is this just one big illusion? Before I know it, I’ve spiralled. I’m in the pit of the illusion, doubting everything I once thought true. Illusions have that effect. The delusion of illusion rarely ends well.
Illusions. If someone were to ask me a few days ago if I had illusions, I would immediately say no.
Oh, okay - well, apart from the occasional existential crisis. That overthinking ‘what is life?’ spiral that WE ALL HAVE? Oh, that’s nothing!
I don’t really believe in illusions. I’m just being dramatic. Rrright?
The biggest illusion you can tell yourself is that you don’t have illusions. Illusions rule our life. And if you don’t believe me, you might be…*whispers quietly* deluded (don’t shoot the messenger!).
Someone recently asked me what illusions I believed in. I - like my previous statement suggests - don’t have them. Or at least, I didn’t think I had them until I dug deep. Really deep.
How about this as a definition of an illusion:
a misinterpreted perception or a false idea or belief.
This is a surprising take on illusions. Or at least, it surprises me. This makes me feel a little defensive. Is the dictionary trying to throw shade at my beliefs? Because I thought illusions might be more of the woo-woo kind where you start questioning whether time actually exists and is what we’re seeing in front of us real. But it feels like this take on illusions is going deep. It feels that it’s not trying to argue about the basic stuff. At least, that’s not my initial reaction. It’s wanting me to examine what I truly believe in and question whether what I believe in is entirely true.
I believe in God. Now this is definitely not an essay on whether God is real or not. But I believe in God. I believe there is enough evidence to suggest he is real and he is real to me. I know I am not alone in this. Yet some may say that Christianity is an illusion. But there are certainly many people who do share my Christian beliefs. This illusion - if that’s your take on it - is a shared experience. Like I’ve mentioned previously in my essay over here, I believe it’s better to believe in God and be wrong than not to believe in God and be wrong. Ultimately, I believe that this belief has very little harm to my overall wellbeing - in fact, quite the opposite. I believe this is a good belief for me. We can probably safely put it in the ‘helpful’ belief box.
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I worry. Not a lot. I have a pretty good handle on my worry but sometimes anxiety likes to remind me that it’s still there. That annoying background humming noise that doesn’t leave.
Did I work hard enough on that project? Did I say the right thing? Why haven’t they replied yet?
Those hassling thoughts that can lead to a spiral. And before you know it, I’ve created a whole made-up narrative.
I didn’t work hard enough and so will probably get fired. True? False!
I really offended that person. True? Completely false - in fact, they were barely paying attention to what I had to say.
They haven’t replied because they hate me? True? Very wrong! They’ve had a family emergency and my message has made their day!
Our worry likes to spiral and in the spiralling, it creates false stories. False stories? False beliefs? You could say: worry is an illusion.
Worry is the state of being anxious and troubled over actual or potential problems.
So, sometimes - just sometimes - worry can be slightly helpful. I say this tentatively because it’s the slightest of slight. A bull is running towards you in a field? You might want to worry. You’ve just remembered your MOT is due tomorrow (*my pre-MOT car wash is due soon but definitely not tomorrow!)? Yeah, worry might come in handy then. But most of the time, I think we can all agree that worry is rarely helpful and definitely not completely true. Could you stand up in court and give evidence that your worrying thoughts are factually correct? Nope? Perfect - so they are illusions. They’re false. If they’re not completely true then they’re wrong. And if they’re wrong, they’re an illusion.
Illusions. Sometimes they can be fairly harmless - or at least, not harmful to others. Sometimes they might not be harmful to others but harmful to ourselves. Sometimes illusions can be - unintentionally - harmful to others.
I am not good enough so I won’t go for that new job. What difference could you make if you did go for that job?
I am really embarrassed that I’ll say the wrong thing. Someone might need to hear exactly what you have to say.
Illusions. Use them wisely. Recognise when they’re working for you. Be aware of when they’re working against you. Whatever you do, don’t be deluded enough to think you don’t live in a world full of illusions. And please don’t waste your energy on illusions that are harmful to you or causing you stress. Put them where they belong - buried deep in the pit of deluded illusions.
Questions to ponder
What does illusions mean to you? What is your emotional reaction when I mention illusions?
What do you worry about most? Could you stand up in a court and give evidence for your worries?
Which illusions are you ready to let go of?
This is wonderful Jess, since the mention of illusions on soul circle I've been pondering over them but the way you put your thoughts into words is inspiring. Thank you.
Thank you for sharing this, Helen :).